unsure

So Ben was supposed to leave for his deployment yesterday. We have not idea when or if he is leaveing. I am trying to not be frustrated. It is really hard. I would just like to know one way or the other what is going on. Plus we have been thinking about the possiablity of re-enlisting in the Air force or maybe going back to Idaho for him to go to school. I did have the strong impression that we were supposed to go to Idaho. But i don't really feel that way anymore. We still have months to figure it all out but it would be nice to know what was going on. There are pros and cons to everything. I almost feel a little lost over everything..

THe BEacH

On Saturday we went to the beach. There were more people there than ever before. It would have been perfect except for the wind. You can see the wind in my hair making it all crazy. The wind made it a bit cold. I tried to take a picture of tristan and of course he tried to hid from me. Even Susie came with us. Also we were walking down the beach Ben asked me where I see us in 5 years and I have no idea. Thoughts of him re-enlisting have come to mind. So many thoughts have been running through my head. I just don't know what we are supposed to do. We did have some fun and it was pretty. At least we got out of the house for the day :) It took my mind off of ben leaving for awhile. We still don't know what it going on. He is supposed to leave tomorrow. Hopefully today we will find out what is going on..

Getting Ready

Kenzie is getting big enough to sit up in the bath tub. I know i was very impressed i wasn't expecting her to do that all ready. She still hasn't got any teeth yet. But probably soon i think. Also Ben got his new "little" bag that he is supposed to take with him. It looks like he is taking the kids with him.

UAE

Yesterday we found out that Ben is going to go to UAE(United Arab Emirates). I am very nervous about the whole thing. Ben is going to be gone for six weeks. Which is going to seem like forever but at least it isn't going to be 4 months like it could have been. But i am still worried they will change their minds on that too. I think he is excited to go. He won't be anywhere to dangerous.. is what he tells me. He is just going to go and do what he does here but in UAE. It is still just scary.

mothers dictionary

Bottle feeding: An opportunity for Daddy to get up at 2 am too.

Defense: What you’d better have around de yard if you’re going to let the children play outside.

Drooling: How teething babies wash their chins.

Dumbwaiter: One who asks if the kids would care to order dessert.

Family planning: The art of spacing your children the proper distance apart to keep you on the edge of financial disaster

Feedback: The inevitable result when the baby doesn’t appreciate the strained carrots.

Full name: What you call your child when you’re mad at him.

Grandparents: The people who think your children are wonderful even though they’re sure you’re not raising them right.

Hearsay: What toddlers do when anyone mutters a dirty word.

Impregnable: A woman whose memory of labor is still vivid.

Independent: How we want our children to be as long as they do everything we say.

Look out: What it’s too late for your child to do by the time you scream it.

Prenatal: When your life was still somewhat your own.

Preprared childbirth: A contradiction in terms.

Puddle: A small body of water that draws other small bodies wearing dry shoes into it.

Show off: A child who is more talented than yours.

Sterilize: What you do to your first baby’s pacifier by boiling it and to your last baby’s pacifier by blowing on it.

Storeroom: The distance required between the supermarket aisles so that children in shopping carts can’t quite reach anything.

Temper tantrums: What you should keep to a minimum so as to not upset the children.

Top bunk: Where you should never put a child wearing Superman jammies.

Two-minute warning: When the baby’s face turns red and she begins to make those familiar grunting noises.

Verbal: Able to whine in words

Whodunit: None of the kids that live in your house.

Whoops: An exclamation that translates roughly into “get a sponge.”
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just thought i would pass this one along.
:)

CaMPinG

Well we were able to go camping this week and for the most part it went really well. But trust me March isn't the best month to go camping not even here in sunny California. Tristan had a good time he just ran around with the dogs and played with sticks. He was excited about the whole thing and he even had the dogs sleep with him which kept him warm and he loved that.We got pretty cold at night even with a million blankets on us.I did get a quick look at the stars that was AWSOME. And the baby didn't want to sleep at all. She fell asleep really well when the sun started to come up.
We did have fun. I just hope next time we go it will be warmer.

Just 'cause

I just need to vent a bit. I was watching oprah today..not a normal thing for me. But they were talking about abusive realtionships. And i can't even tell you the feelings that flooded back to me while watching this show. My ex had so many issues. And he always made me feel like it was my fault and very emotionaly abusive. He would tell me where i could go. He got mad at me if i was looking around because he thought i was trying to check other guys out..then i just started looking down alot. And i never was looking at other guys. REALLY! I realized the other day that i still do that from time to time just out of habbit. He would get so mad if i talked to my family and/or friends. And he would drink and get so mad and me and i wouldn't ever understand why and then in the morning he wouldn't remember. It was terrible and i am so glad that i am not in that anymore. Who knows what might have happened to me. i am so lucky to have Ben. He told me the other day that he hated how badly my ex had treated me. That felt so good. i didn't know that he even thought about it. And looking back on it i feel so stupid that i let him treat me that way. Love isn't supposed to be like that. I guess my point is that things can get better no matter how bad things are. And stand up for yourself..